Guinness book of world records 1984 by norris mcwhirter. On october 7, 2009, tyndale house publishers issued the official chuck norris fact book. Chuck norris hosts inaugural 5k where all the runners dressed up as chuck norris. Submit your own chuck norris jokes and facts to our site. Chuck norris jokes a selection of the best 30 jokes.
The company will hold its firstever cforce chuck norris 5k run in college station, texas, on may 4, 2019. One of the chuck norris facts specifically, the one where a snake. To think his epic legacy all started in a small town called ryan, oklahoma chuck was born in 1940 to wilma and ray norris. Just a fun page where you can share chuck norris pics and jokes lol be lucky. Chuck norris is ten feet tall, weighs twotons, breathes fire, and could eat a hammer and take a shotgun blast standing. Bruce lee met chuck norris at a karate expo, which lead to norris appearing on screen to fight bruce lee in return of the dragon. Carlos ray norris is known as chuck norris to pretty much everyone except his close friends and family. Walker texas ranger actor, apogee of toughness, chuck. Chuck norris can strangle you with a cordless phone. On the last page of the guinness book of world records it is noted. What was going through the minds of all of chuck norris victims before they died.
Chuck norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people, then it exploded. On the last page of the guinness book of world records it is noted that all records are held by chuck norris, and that those listed are simply the closest anyone. It was only 5 pages long because chuck norris roundhouse kicked saurons ass halfway through the first 7 chapters. The values toughguy chuck norris lives by are sure to. Robert rousseau is a martial arts expert and a former senior writer for mma fighting.
In fine print on the last page of the guinness book of world records it notes that all world records. The chuck norris jokes started in the summer of 2005 as the result of a thread on the somethingawful forums. Chuck norris to host 5k race that could set chuck norris looka. Chuck norris has a diary called the guinness book of wo funny. Chuck norris invented zombies so that he can kill his victims again. Texas senate names chuck norris honorary texan abc houston. Where did the chuck norris joke phenomena originate from. Impress your friends by breaking or inventing your own chuck norris world. And fine print on the last page of the guinness book of record of world records in knows that all world records are held by chuck norris and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever got. Chuck norris invented the olympic games in hopes of finding a worthy opponent. When chuck norris says hes buying a 6 pack for the game, hes talking about barrels. Celebrate air force veteran chuck norris 80th birthday. When chuck norris got his first slingshot, he created what we now know today as the moon, mars, jupitar, saturn and pluto.
He is one of the most recognizable faces in hollywood and the martial arts industry. Guinness book of world records by norris mcwhirter alibris. When chuck norris falls into a puddle of water he doesnt get wet, the water gets chuck norris. Chuck norris jokes and facts random chuck norris joke fact chuck norris shot j. The expendables 2 sylvester stallone, chuck norris.
Chuck norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a. Rate each chuck norris joke fact with our 5 star rating system. Chuck norris has published the official chuck norris fact book. Funny joke chuck norris has a diary called the guinness book of world records from kickass humor, bringing you the best jokes on the web. Chuck norris was sending an email one day, when he realized that it would be faster to run. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died. The original lord of the rings book was about chuck norris. Best chuck norris jokes facts browse the full list. Every one of chuck norris blood cells have black belts. On the last page of the guinness world records book, it is noted that chuck norris does, in fact, own all of the records, and the ones that are listed are simply. This 305 page soft cover book is easy to read and is filled with stories from chuck norriss vast experience as a martial artist and an actor. Chuck norris has never had to pay taxes ever is that thats not true.
Its called the guinness book of world records, said a gc announcement about the new hire. They actually are a warning that chuck norris is the owner of the place. Chuck norris has 24 books on goodreads with 24037 ratings. The marvelous chuck norris has been a part of many films and jokes alike. A thread started called post your vin diesel facts in response to the movie the pacifier coming out. Chuck norris 5k chuck norris race guinness world record. Chuck norris has inside jokes with complete strangers. Chuck norris once ate an entire ream of rice paper and shat out origami swans and mister miyagi from karate kid. Com walker, texas ranger is looking to set a world record in the lone star state.
In fine print on the guinness book of world records it notes that all records are held by chuck norris, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten. Carlos ray chuck norris was born on march 10, 1940, in ryan, oklahoma to wilma and ray norris. When chuck norris looks in a mirror the mirror shatters, because not even glass is stupid enough to get in between chuck norris and chuck norris. I found this book not just highly informative but very humorous as well. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop. Check out some of the coolest and quirkiest chuck norris world records and videos. Runners donned their best fake beards, boots, and jorts.
Chuck norris vs the one above all death battle fanon. In fine print on the last page of the guinness book of world records it notes that all world records are held by chuck. Chuck norris community discussions the aetherlight forums. Chuck norris is not a man of few roundhouse kicks to the face. Chuck norris world records world records recordsetter. Ill explain in a minute, but first, a few chuck norris jokes to get us started. Giraffes were created when chuck norris uppercutted a horse. Please practice handwashing and social distancing, and. Chuck norris in wwe also prevented jeff from interfering undertaker and yokozumo.
Doomsday and galactus vs chuck norris battles comic vine. Norris dewar mcwhirter cbe 12 august 1925 19 april 2004 was a british writer, political activist, cofounder of the freedom association, and a television presenter. Buy guinness book of world records 1984 by norris mcwhirter online at alibris. Chuck norris sayings are very funny and we strongly belive that you will like them too. Hes about to set a new world record for achieving 100% policy compliance.
In fine print on the last page of the guinness book of world records it notes that all world records are held by chuck norris, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten. Impress your friends by breaking or inventing your own chuck norris world records on. Norris won the professional middleweight karate tournament in 1968. If your chucky would exist, he would stand behind me right now and would smash my head against my keyb34t89j93 fh3of j9f83h4f983h 9f. Anyone who pisses off chuck norris gets handed a dead guy ale. Chuck norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis. See more ideas about chuck norris, chuck norris facts and jokes. Chuck norris once peed in the gas tank of a diesel truck. The player takes control of chuck norris himself in a sidescrolling beat em up. Chuck norris wants to set world record for most people dressed. The only time chuck norris was wrong was when he thought he had made a mistake. Chuck norris gave cats nine lives so he could kill them more.
Joke for saturday, 26 november 2011 from site daily chuck. In the back of every issue of guinness book of world records. The guinness book of world records is actually chuck norris elementary school report card. Chuck norris doesnt flush the toilet he scares the shit out of it. Nostalgia chuck norris reading chuck norris facts is. Chuck norris hired to enforce compliance in adventist church. The only time chuck norris was wrong was when he thought he had made.
Chuck norris guinees book of world records uploaded 05302008 in fine print, on the last page of the guiness book of world records, it notes that all world records are held by chuck norris, and those listed in the book are just the closest that anyone has ever gotten. Chuck norris has a lifetime karate record of 183 wins, 10 losses, and 2 draws. If you live to see christmas, that is your christmas present from chuck. Celebrate usaf veteran chuck norris 80th birthday with 20. Chuck norris doesnt flush the toilet, he scares the shit out of it. Chuck norris guinees book of world records joke ebaum. Biography of chuck norris, actor and martial artist. Chuck norris was once on celebrity wheel of fortune and was the first to spin. Chuck norris biography affair, married, wife, ethnicity. There were 404 folks who dressed up like albert einstein in a 2017 feat that set a new mark in the guinness book of world records. The greatest chuck norris beer facts beerfestboots blog.
Buy guinness book of world records by norris mcwhirter online at alibris. Chuck norris can roundhouse a 4pack of dfh 90 minute ipa into one bottle of 360 minute ipa. Chuck norris secretly sleeps with every woman in the world once a month, they bleed for a week because of it. Chuck norris lost his virginity before his father did. In fine print on the last page of the guinness book of world records it notes that all world records are held by chuck norris, and those listed in the.
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